What is a power dynamic?
Power is defined as the possibility or ability of someone to cause or influence something. Power can be held by virtue of a position or office. If a person can decide over others, this is considered power. If one person in a relationship has decision-making power over another person or their activities, this is referred to as a power dynamic or imbalance.
Why do we talk about power dynamic in BDSM?
A power dynamic is the central element of any BDSM relationship or activity. It is, so to speak, the core of BDSM, which makes the difference to the terms fetish and kinks in general.
We always distinguish between an active and more powerful partner and a partner with less power. It does not matter whether it is a D/s constellation in the classic sense or simple bondage games.
Playing with power
Depending on the personal preferences of the participants, the power dynamic can look very different. A classic constellation, for example, involves the Dom commanding the Sub and punishing any misconduct. The distribution of power can also be clearly defined in role-playing games, for example with teacher and student, boss and assistant, pet owner and pet and so on.
Whether a power dynamic only exists during a session or is a permanent thing in the 24/7 construct is decided by the game or relationship partners themselves within a consensual framework. For many relationships, a middle ground is the solution, which incorporates BDSM elements into everyday life and uses rituals to mark the beginning and end of the power dynamic.
At eye level despite differences?
Good and open communication is important in every relationship. However, the balancing act between power imbalance and equality in a relationship can only be achieved with clear communication. Without open communication about wishes, boundaries and taboos, such a relationship cannot function at all. Even if a 24/7 construct or a TPE relationship is appealing in the imagination, you should not be under the illusion that you can give in to it at any time.
This includes social occasions where restraint is required or simply for health or emotional reasons. People are not machines and sometimes the mood just isn’t there to play. Then a break from the power imbalance is called for. This must be clearly communicated to your partner, especially in “full-time relationships”, so that no misunderstandings arise.
