What actually is a fetish?

Contents

What does fetish actually mean?
Difference to BDSM and kink
How does a fetish develop?
What fetishes are there?
When is a fetish pathological?
Fetish & lifestyle

What does fetish actually mean?

According to Wikipedia, the term “fetish” is borrowed from the French word “fétiche,” which in turn derives from the Portuguese “feitiço,” meaning the worship of objects endowed with divine or magical properties. Karl Marx later adopted the term to describe the quasi-religious relationship humanity developed with money, capital, and commodities under capitalism. He wasn’t fond of it.

It wasn’t until the late 19th century that psychologists began associating the concept of fetishism with sexuality, describing the devotion to specific body parts, for example. The term gained significant popularity outside scientific circles in the early 20th century, largely due to Sigmund Freud. Who else? It’s probably not surprising that Freud classified such preferences as pathological or perverse.

When the general public talks about a fetish, they typically mean any kind of specific sexual practice, including role-playing and activities, especially those from the BDSM realm. It fits in a way because they are also somewhat magical.

Strictly speaking, sexual fetishism refers to fixation on specific objects, materials, or body parts. The World Health Organization even defines it narrowly as sexual arousal to non-living objects. Non-fetishists often claim to have a fetish, perhaps to appear unique or interesting. For instance, saying one has a fetish for underwear or high heels because they find them attractive doesn’t align with true fetishism but rather emphasizes sexual preference.

However, if someone collects underwear, especially with specific qualities, feels a constant need to view or touch them for arousal, and their thoughts are dominated by this collection, it represents genuine fetishism. “Fetish” denotes sexual attraction to an object, not simply a strong liking or preference.

Difference to BDSM and kink

The transitions to BDSM and kink are fluid. The numerous overlaps in sexual deviations have even led to a shared subculture. While there is no clear demarcation, there are emphasized focal points.

Imagine a spectrum where one end is BDSM, centered around power dynamics as its core element. At the other end is object-oriented sexual fetishism, where no partner is necessary for its practice, and this practice becomes the sole form of sexual activity possible. Everything in between on this spectrum is possible.

For some, a diaper fetish only becomes complete when they submit to another person within the framework, exhibiting childlike behavior. A submissive who had to lick the feet of another person as part of degradation may have experienced such intense stimulation that they become aroused by the mere thought of feet.

Kinks, on the other hand, could refer to a general preference for specific practices of physical or psychological nature that are employed along this spectrum. For instance, watersports can be a fetish in itself or utilized within BDSM. Or both. Thus, BDSM and fetishism can be seen as poles of a shared world, held together by kinks, where there is much to explore.

Where does a fetish come from?

In this field, little research exists, leading to only theories or incomplete concepts. The most coherent theory suggests that fundamentally, every person has the predisposition for a sexual fetish. However, it only develops when a specific trigger and sexual arousal are simultaneously stimulated, causing the brain to irreversibly associate both.

Against this theory, it is argued that if true, far more people would develop a fetish, and the diversity would be even higher. Furthermore, the theory does not explain why fetishism is more common in men than in women. Nor does it account for why a fetish almost never diminishes or disappears over time.

Fetishes can emerge at any time. Some discover their inclination very early in childhood, others in adolescence, and some much later in adulthood. A fetish can also evolve or be complemented by others over time.

What fetishes are there?

Essentially, anything can be a fetish. Remarkably, some fetishes are more widespread than others. Among the most prevalent are those linked to specific clothing items such as shoes, stockings, and uniforms. For many, the material of the clothing plays a significant role, with preferences ranging from latex and leather to silk, nylon, or fur.

Fetishes tied to individual body parts often, though not always, coincide with submissive behavior. The most well-known and widespread is the foot fetish. Some Fetishists are driven wild by armpits, ears, or other specific body parts.

Object and object-based fetishes like balloons, trees, machines, radios, or pedal pumping have achieved a degree of fame. Due to their incomprehensibility to the general public, such preferences are often found under articles with sensational headlines like “The 10 most unusual sexual preferences,” presumably to provide readers with something to laugh about. Particularly spectacular are cases where women develop feelings of love for objects like the Eiffel Tower in Paris or the Berlin Wall beyond mere sexual attraction.

When does a fetish become problematic?

The definition between a sexual preference and a genuine disorder becomes contentious. As enchanting as a fetish can be, the line is drawn when others are involved against their will in these sexual fantasies or when harm is inflicted upon others or oneself. Another boundary is reached when a fetish becomes so urgent and irreplaceable for sexual arousal that it causes distress for the individual. Caution is also necessary with fetishes that pose health or life risks, such as those involving feces.