BDSM is sick? We and guest author Katharina-Sophie say No”. It’s only a matter of time before BDSM becomes more socially acceptable. Although some vanillas may see it differently.

This text with the title “BDSM is sick – says the vanilla” first appeared on Katharina-Sophie’s currently paused blog and was made available to Deviance.


The “sick” thing about BDSM is the person who labels it that way. Point! Nothing more, nothing less.

If you sit in the black and red BDSM bubble, you hear relatively little of the vanillas. Of course you have contact with your vanilla friends, but they are always open-minded and often would like to find out more about the matter.

Since you only move in circles where trust, love, respect and tolerance, but also consistency and rules determine your everyday interactions, you sometimes forget that the world around you looks different.

Sexual abuse, violence, hatred and degradation are all the more real in the supposedly clean vanilla world. So someone who describes himself as dominant told a woman he just wanted for a one-night stand, but who politely declined and said she already had a master but was looking for a Serf for herself and her master answered:

“You have a screw loose and a psychopath! Take your sick ‘master’ as a serf and drive him to the asylum. This is insane!!! You’d be better off finding a warden as a serf.”

Message in an online forum

That is sick. This answer is insulting, degrading, contemptuous, disrespectful and full of hatred towards people living differently.

We remember: He just wanted to fuck the woman (cheaply) – without any obligations, without anything. Someone who is 30 years younger than him. Anyway: Why should she take part? Yes, we are a minority. But maybe there are only so few of us because respect, trust and cosmopolitanism are not so widespread.

However, as long as they are not doing anything illegal, no one has the right to condemn, insult or suggest that other people are less worthy in any way.

We remember the right to vote for women (1918), the abolition of the criminalization of homosexuality (1969), the possibility of same-sex marriage (2017) and now the ban on pseudotherapies (2020). (Editor’s note: This is referring to Germany. See also: law on protection against conversion treatments)

It’s time to show that we Doms and Subs, Masters and Serfs, Daddies and Girls and Kittens are perhaps even the better people and to openly stand behind what BDSM really is, so as not to be criticized by narrow-minded, ignorant, disrespectful and misogynistic people Vanillas being able to be put in a box that is beneath their own.

Because that’s actually not possible. These people have, if you want to put it that way, already reserved the bottom drawer for themselves.

#NormalizeBDSM

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